the dance of the ink riddled fingers

project pebbles

Posted in handfuls of ambition, heroes of mine by enisea on 01/06/2011

We talked dreams today.  We sat around and skipped a couple of stones, showing them briefly to those next to us and then quickly skipping them over the water of imagination and possibility, reminding ourselves of the excitement we had when we first began the practice of making ripples!  Having not since heard an inspiring or ambitious dream in a little while, this afternoon’s coffee was refreshing.

Since the beginning of the year, when I asked a friend or other what dreams/ambitions/plans/goals they had for this year were, I’ve usually been met with the very mundane and unoriginal “making money, getting by”.  In my desperate search for something to be inspired by, and to steer away from the standard topics of conversation, I’ve sometimes asked if they have projects they’re working on, to which they reply with cocked heads and quizzical expression, “projects?”.  I think one of the most heartbreaking parts of living in such middle class complacency is how bland the average future seems to be!  It is as though the concept of working at something ambitious, challenging and in one’s own time is foreign to people; or that the only projects most would consider are the ones they get paid for!!

Today I sat amongst company who had dreams and projects.  Haha, simply on the topic of what plans we had over the 6 week college break, I asked somebody I didn’t know exactly well what her plans were.  She said “Oh, just a couple of projects I’m working on”.  This is where I start getting hopeful, but reigned myself in quickly, for pattern had me accustomed to meeting my buzzing expectation with really safe and mild projects.  However, I maintained my enthusiasm as for once I wasn’t the one introducing the ambiguous term, “Oh! Projects! I love projects! Tell me about them!”

This is where I held the breath of my heart in hungry anticipation, wondering whether somebody, for once, had a big, big project.

She did.  She told me she had an idea for starting a string of childcare centres in a little part of Malaysia (and she’s anglo white) of hopeful strategy, to employ the locals and educate not only children but families in subtle combat to the regime of an authority trying to subdue faith.  I got pretty excited, and even more so when she said “the problem is, I know nothing about childcare and how to train people”!  I’ll tell you why I got so excited, because the dream was huge – so big and in such an unfamiliar territory, yet that did not shadow her dream!  What’s wonderful is having a dream that doesn’t leave you, even if you have no idea what it entails.  What’s even more heartening is having others to share the dream with and to invest into projects and grow them on several fronts!

The beginning of large stoney masterpiece dreams start with pebble projects.  Here’s a couple of suggestions: bind a book, write a book, read 10 books, make a collage, paint a painting, build something, create something, complete something, establish something, make 4 people laugh every week, buy 3 strangers a coffee every fortnight, write postcards to people 5 times a month, research your family tree, make a cookbook, start an online shop, make a video of the people you love, do a social experiment on human kindness and write reports on them. Please, do something! (Preferrably something not fame/popularity orientated)

I know I may have implied that ‘safe and mild dreams’ disappointed me, but they only do when the person they belong to display no excitement concerning them.  If void of enthusiasm, how heartfelt is the dream/project? Because as far as I’m concerned, dreams indict excitement, they bring hope and aspiration, they provoke creativity and adaptivity!  If you’re life is dull; if all you do is work, watch TV and scroll social networks/media/blogs, if that’s all you’re doing, if you have nothing you are investing your humanity into, I pity you.  Start something new, try to inspire somebody else, be they stranger or friend – not for self-gratification, but for somebody else’s sake. Heck, try to inspire yourself!  You of critical analysis and unimpressed report, what projects do you have?  What dreams do you have?

And sometimes projects are successful and sometimes they’re not.  I tried opening an online shop which I thought was fantastic, but it didn’t sell a thing for the 6 month listing it lasted for… This said, I can tick that box of having tried it and learned what’s involved in setting up an online shop!  I’ve made photobooks, I’ve made projects out of Christmas shopping and entering dress making competitions, (and after this college semester is over) and plan to enter a short story competition!  Sure, they’re small but they pump a wonderful adrenaline of aspiring achievement through veins of routine!

Here’s a project I started once, paused, and will continue hopefully later (I currently have no time to maintain it)… Haha, I did it for such as those without dreams.  But I wouldn’t have started it if I hadn’t told raCh and if she hadn’t shared in it and come with me:


3 Responses

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  1. Rach said, on 02/06/2011 at 3:16 PM

    Forever the dreamer my pretty! My life is plenty dull now since I’ve been staring this essay down for a week now while working, watch Angry Boys and scrolling through Tumblr all day long.

    To do lists are such fun. Projects are ALWAYS conjured up in the midst of essays, I can’t wait for the holidays to begin

  2. Rach said, on 02/06/2011 at 3:16 PM


    • enisea said, on 02/06/2011 at 9:02 PM

      Oh gosh, these 4 essays are gnawing at me. one week. WHAT? one week: 1500, 2000, 2000, 3000 + a take home exam. HAHAHA, you’re right, projects and dreams only come when i can’t afford to daydream… i should’ve known. seeyou shortly, golden girl ;)

      ps: check email

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