the dance of the ink riddled fingers

another day borrowed

Posted in epiphany tiffany, pin the tail on the love by enisea on 15/07/2011

I used to still wake up in the mornings and over the years have made habit of sighing “there’s so much for me to do today”.  Because there just seems to be so much going on in my life and so many obligations that I somehow signed myself up for.  So many of my ideas are on the tip of my tongue and at the forefront of my memory.  So confess, I must, that until now, I was wrongly assuming that life was mine to do with as I pleased; for me to live as righteously as I knew how!

Unfortunately, my repertoire of righteousness and good works for living this so-called “good life” is not exactly what I’d call a long list.  And every time I try to think of ways to do life well, I exasperate myself and become very, very tired.

Bottomline? I relinquish life. I cannot do it well, I can barely do it by myself.  I cannot sustain morning by morning, waking up to the backlog of good and productive things that I forgot to do yesterday, nor stand the daily expiry of “feel good” to “guilt” for ambitions unacquainted.

I’ve just begun starting my mornings waking up and, after a mumble or two of stirring and whispers to God, asking Him what He would have me do today… and it’s really lifted the pressure of each ‘evil’ day!  I suppose this realisation that I’m borrowing these days and hopes and joys and love from Him has finally begun to sink.  I mean, I wouldn’t have them without His provision and certainly wouldn’t want them without His company! 

So yes, another borrow day… remembering who I do life for.

Not that God needs my help, but it’s nice to ask anyway.  I’m sure He appreciates it (out of love and not out of need).

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