the dance of the ink riddled fingers

the saddest bunch I’ve ever met

Posted in epiphany tiffany by enisea on 30/08/2011

Here I am wishing that strength and discipline could be acquired by joining the choir and learning the choreography of a wonderful four minute song.  I don’t like losing sleep, I don’t like repetitious and enduring work, I don’t like the almost breathless ache of exhaustion from pushing that one more slow  lap of flimsy stroke.  Nor do I like the unreasonable amount of time it takes me to get organised, clean up, keep up and satisfy obligation/responsibility.  I don’t like watching my dreams collect dust, but don’t like feeling guilty during the construction of them because I should have been fulfilling some current expectation instead.  I don’t like knowing that I try hard to impress people and therefore establish some stupid high standard which I probably fail to meet on countless occassions because I’m not as impressive as I put out to be.

Yet, of all my dislikes, the part that I like, is how much I can be loved by just one, despite how much all the strangers and loved ones in the world dislike me… and despite how much I dislike myself.

I like and dislike getting down to business.

The business is not at all about me.  This is probably the reason I both like and dislike it.

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